Research shows that 80% of people don’t enjoy their career and have other dreams, but don’t take the risk to make them a reality.

I use the word risk on purpose, because fear is the main reason we stop ourselves having what we really want. Fear that we won’t make it. Fear that when we get there, our dream won’t be as good as we imagined. Fear that it will, but that we are selfish or arrogant for having such a good life. Fear of what other people might think. Fear of not having enough money or security. You name it, we can be afraid of it.

And yet, one of my greatest fears is that I will live a life without meaning. I am afraid that when I die I will not have not used my time and abilities to make the world a better place. It sounds corny, but it is a deeply held fear.

So for me, the signs that you are living what Thoreau called ‘a life of quiet desperation’ are warnings indeed. But warnings that contain within them clues that can help us all find the fulfilment and purpose that we are craving.

Take a look and see if you recognise any of them in yourself. And if you do, just ask, what am I going to do about it? What am I going to do to make sure I live the life I am really capable of?

Warning no.1:

You get excited and inspired when you hear about someone who has taken risks and made a real difference in their life, but you don’t take action yourself.

The people who inspire you are like beacons. They prove to us that it is possible to succeed. They provide a pathway to follow, when the path seems unclear.

We can learn a lot about what is important to use by looking at the people we are most interested in. What is it about them that lifts our hearts? Spend a moment to notice. Then find a way, however big or small, to build that into your own life.

Warning no. 2

You tell yourself that there is nothing you can do because there is a recession on.

Change is challenging at any time. But people who make things happen during the toughest periods learn to be resilient and resourceful. If you can make it now, just what will you be capable of when times are good.

It is true that many career changes are more challenging in a recession. But this warning is often used as an excuse for not living the life that you want right now.

There will always be a reason to delay. There are always more reasons not to.

Warning no. 3

You tell yourself that changing career is just too risky.

We all live with risk all the time. Even staying where you are involves risk.

The way to deal with this is threefold:

  1. Check whether the risks are real, or based on unreal fears.
  2. Create a life where you are set up to give yourself the security you really need. Find ways to manage the risks. Pay off debt or put aside some savings. Develop your skills so you are more employable. This strategy gives you security whatever you decide to do with your life.
  3. Make changes you can accommodate, even if you fail. Do your research. Meet people in the field you want to move to. Make a plan. Find ways to make the change gradually.

Warning no. 4

You have a rant about how ‘unlucky’ you are not having the chance to make a difference

If you are reading this you are wealthy enough to have internet access, educated enough to read and interested enough in changing your life to have got down to warning no. 4. It is true that luck plays a part in everyone’s life. But you are already amongst some of the luckiest people in the world.

Now it is time to make more of your own luck. Delve into what you have learned from the toughest experiences in your life. Listen to your gut when it tells you what difference you would most like to make in the world. Think about what you can do, rather than what you can’t. Now just go and do it.

Warning no. 5

You tell yourself that you don’t have the time to make a career change

Do you have the time not to? Life is short.

Time is one of the two most common excuses for not changing career (the other being money). But if single mothers with kids and a job can do it, you can do it. You just need one important thing: to decide, really decide, that you are going to.

It is true that you cannot do everything in life. But you can do one or two of the things at the top of your list. It is up to you. Is this at the top?

Warning no. 6

You know that too many of your decisions are being driven by fear, but you just can’t help yourself

Fear is probably the most powerful emotion that most of us have. For long-standing survival reasons, fear doesn’t often operate consciously. Instead it triggers responses that keep us doing what we have always done.

The more we can make our fears conscious and get help overcoming them, the more we build our courage muscles. And the more we build our courage muscles, the more we have choices in our lives to do what really matters.

Start practising with tiny steps that allow you to look fear in the eye and tell it that you will be fine.

Warning no. 7

You used to have fun, have dreams, have vision: but now you just to what you need to, to get through the day

Does it feel like you are existing, rather than living? This warning sign is like the mother of all the others. You know if applies to you in all or part of your life.

What do you you need to do about it? Find ways to rediscover that fun, those dreams, that vision. Listen to yourself to hear what is important. And find ways to make it true for yourself. Even if those ways are small – take a moment to do a creative project, go for a walk in the sunshine, reconnect with an old friend – make sure you do the things that bring you back to life regularly.

Warning no. 8

Whenever you use any of the excuses above, you have a quiet sinking feeling in your gut. Yes, that is the ‘quiet desperation’ making itself heard, quietly.

It is time to stop telling yourself that it is OK, if it isn’t. You know, you always know, if you are putting off the things that matter most. Start by listening to yourself. And see what you learn about who you really are.

What are the warning signs in your own life? How have you overcome them, or how do you plan to? Are there others I have missed? Post a comment below to let me know what you think.

Services

Coaching and Career Development

Third Sector Management Consultancy

 

Coaching and Career Development

*** Stop Press *** Latest News – The New Free Teleseminar for career changers is now available.  See home page for more details and find out how to sign up.

If you are in the middle of a career change, you will know how stressful it can be.  Not only am I a qualified careers adviser and experienced business coach, but I have made a major career change myself, more than once.  Both times it has been stressful in the process, but so worth it in the end.  So I am well placed to help others make the same move.  I have two specialities:

  • helping people move from public or private sector careers to find their first voluntary / third sector role
  • helping people start a business, charity or social enterprise that allows them to do work that resonates with their values

For both of these groups, I work with people who want to bring meaning to their work and allow their talents to enrich the world, even if they don’t yet know how to do this.  I focus on both the practical and the emotional aspects of career change or business start-up, from CVs, interview and business plans and funding to defining your true passion, developing confidence and overcoming your fears.

Helping you to get work in the voluntary sector is currently my primary focus.  To get free help, just download the workbook by signing up to my newsletter at the top right of this page.

Case Studies:

1. BizFizz Business Coaching

I worked with entrepreneurs in the Ocean Estate in East London, coaching them to start or grow small and medium sized businesses. Amongst the success stories were:

  • a 19 year old woman who obtained a bank loan and bought a newsagent.  I helped her find a suitable and affordable newsagent to buy, wrote up her business plan for her, introduced her to a bank manager and she presented her heart out and impressed him.
  • a young man who started a DVD and games sales and rental outlet.  I introduced him to the Princes Trust and helped him to write the business plan which got him their loan
  • a mother who ran a charity supporting Bangladeshi women.  I worked a lot with her listening and helping her with staying focussed and marketing her projects
  • a homeless ex-serviceman who first got a job and later ran his own pub.  The help I offered was mainly to treat him like a person who had the ability to make his life a success.  Visiting the office where I worked meant he had somewhere to go where he felt accepted and gave him the time, space, resources and confidence to get what he wanted.

These were all individuals who mixed determination with uncertainty, like many small business people. The coaching I offered was personal, professional and practical and helped them to stay on track and achieve their aims in tough circumstances.

2. Talking Jobs

Talking Jobs is a web resource using a propriety video system which allows individuals to listen to interviews with people working in a range of careers. Using my careers expertise and contacts and my business experience, I have worked with Andrew Manson, founder and developer of Talking Jobs, in a range of areas. This includes identifying potential interested partners and sales leads within the careers field, coaching Andrew on clarifying his communication of the benefit of Talking Jobs to potential customers and looking at new potential uses for the video system that could generate sales.

3. Refugee programmes

I have worked with refugees for two specialist agencies, first as a volunteer for Refugees Into Jobs in Wembley and later and an employee for Refugee Education, Training and Advisory Service (RETAS).  In each, I gave one to one careers development advice for refugees and asylum seekers.  Many of them were highly qualified, but unable to use their professional qualifications in the UK, and so were looking to change careers while supporting their families.  This group faces particular barriers to the job market which might include discrimination and language barriers, but they are also often determined and entrepreneurial.  The help I offered included advice and guidance, help with CVs, interview coaching and business start up training and advice.

Third Sector Management Consultancy

I offer a range of services to organisations in the third sector, centred around strengthening the effectiveness and self-sufficiency of the organisation.  Once again, the help might be practical or personal.  Services include developing new projects, generating new sources of earned income to reduce grant dependency, strategy and business planning, interim management and resolving internal conflict.

Case Studies:

1. Interim Management: Law Centres Federation (LCF)

I was Interim Director of the Law Centres Federation for five months while a new Director was recruited and relocated from Australia. The organisation was going through a period of change with two of its major sources of funding running out and new funding streams starting. Organisational restructuring was therefore imperative. I undertook this restructuring, recruited new staff, clarified the financial systems and left the organisation with a newly developed strategy. I also co-ordinated a successful joint application for discrimination law funding by 40 Law Centres and worked with other advice agency umbrella bodies, Citizens Advice and Advice UK, to generate Big Lottery Advice+ and Legal Services Commission funding applications and implement them for LCF.

Project Development: Broomleigh Housing Association

I developed a new project designed to allow young people and other community members living at or near the Foyer@Croydon to develop entrepreneurial skills. The project was designed as a social enterprise with start up funding from the Croydon LEGI project. It allowed participants to develop IT, marketing, team and organisational skills by selling products through Ebay, which gives immediate customer feedback and is therefore an excellent learning tool.

Feasibility Study: Totally Connected

I researched and wrote a full feasibility study investigating the cost and logistics involved in offering low cost computers and broadband to housing association residents. This feasibility study covered four different social housing providers encompassing a range of contexts from high density urban to remote rural areas. The project included primary research with residents (using questionnaires and focus groups), a basic technical specification, an analysis of the broadband market, financial analysis and recommendations.

Project Evaluation: Vital Regeneration

I undertook a project evaluation of an education project for people living in temporary accommodation. The evaluation involved primary research with project beneficiaries and the people running the project, including focus groups and individual interviews. I also assessed the outcomes statistically, benchmarked with a similar project and made recommendations for future projects.

Business Planning: Live and Learn

I developed a business plan and funding strategy for a residential care centre for young people with learning disabilities and an adapted playground for young people with physical and learning disabilities, including options appraisals and calculations of loan interest.

Social Franchising: Pilotlight

Pilotlight runs a successful charity support organisation which matches business mentors with social organisations in need of expert help. Pilotlight was interested in franchising the model across the UK and beyond. I wrote feasibility examining how this franchising could be developed, what would be included in the franchise fee, territory and training.

Collaboration: Southwark Law Centre

I wrote a report examining the effects of SLC collaborating with other legal advice agencies within the borough. The report considered a range of issues including accommodation, financial and cultural matters.

Fundraising: Cambridge House

I wrote successful fundraising applications for this community anchor to gain Capacitybuilders funding to develop a major refurbishment project at Cambridge House and enable them to offer additional services to their community, often by collaborating with other small charities and groups.